Man, this doesn't really have too much to do with writing. I think I had a 'bad mom' moment. I'm not sure yet. Maybe some of you other parents out there can tell me.
Israel started preschool about two weeks ago now. The first day she was great--paid me no mind whatsoever when I left. For the past week or so now, she's been screaming when I leave, not to mention, her teacher told me she bit someone and that she kind of bullies the other kids and she's always taking someone's cup or bottle. I'm trying to work with her on that--slowly.
But that doesn't begin to touch on what she did yesterday. So I pick her up a little early from school and she was fine. They said she was pretty good save for playing a little rough (I swear she's a boy sometimes).
We get outside, and I'm walking with my friend Anna (she works at the day care as well) and I give Israel her sippy cup which she calls 'cuppie' and suddenly, out of the blue, she flings it and begans shrieking like a banshee! I'm just like 'Holy crap girl, wth?' It was so random that I'm still reeling from it! So Anna tries to give her a lollipop and she throws it. She throws the cup, she kicks off her shoes...she's just SCREAMING and leaning out of her stroller and you'd think that someone was torturing her. People are staring at us and I can just hear them thinking 'Get that brat under control.' But like...I couldn't. She complete lost her mind. Anna and I get to the bus stop and I take her out of her stroller and she's twisting and arching and throwing herself back. She's flinging her arms and she scratched me dangerously close to my eye.
And seriously--I wanted to hand her off to someone and walk away for a moment. I don't remember being so frusterated, embarassed and angry with my daughter. It was so bad that I was nearly in tears. She was like this on the bus..just screaming and I still have no idea what the hell happened.
She calmed down once we got in the house and I was so angry with her that I just took off her clothes, wiped her down, gave her some cold water and put her in her high chair. I didn't want to look at her, speak to her, hold her...NOTHING. I couldn't believe she did that to me. She's supposed to be my best friend and I never imagined that my kid would be THAT kid. I'm sitting here wondering if anything is wrong with her. Most of the time she's a good girl. A little hard-headed and willful and she's always getting into things... but this whole..biting, and hitting is just...wow.
I'm thinking this HAS to be her dad's side of the family because most of them are freaking psychotic. I started noticing a pattern in her behavior when she spent time with them, so I took her away, hoping that Eric and myself and MY family would be a better influence.
I was so drained yesterday that I couldn't write and I got a headache from hell.
It wasn't her first tantrum, but it was her first public one. I don't think a could survive a secound round.
I even emailed my mom like "Mom...she's horrible...what do I do!!"
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